The big O. The O-face. The Oh-My-God Olympics. It’s called many names and they all feel equally as sweet. That’s because orgasm is a perfectly natural occurrence, plus it’s excellent for your health. A gift from above, triggered down below, it is.
Did you know that some doctors now recommend ejaculation to help combat a variety of diseases? Back in the day, they would have told you that your insatiable sexual appetites were a sign of demonic possession. Thank God for science and sex toys.
Today, you can reach a climax in countless ways without anyone even batting an eye. We’ve got automatic machines, full-sized life-like dolls, and even virtual reality equipment to play with. But none of that guarantees an orgasm because, well, it’s actually all in your head.
What is an orgasm?
This experience feels so amazing that people have written sonnets about it. The sensation is mentioned in the Bible and referred to in just about every movie on the planet. It’s an extremely intense feeling of deep pleasure, usually emanating from the pelvic region. Some people mix it up with coming or climaxing, yet you can have an orgasm without ejaculation.
What’s the difference between orgasm and ejaculation?
An orgasm is not the same as ejaculation, although the two almost always go hand-in-hand. Generally speaking, the Big O is an overwhelming, full-bodied sensation accompanied by uncontrollable pelvic floor or anal contractions. Alternatively, coming is generally just the experience of ejaculating fluid after direct contact with the genitals.
As expected, you can feel both at the same time or experience neither depending on several factors, such as:
- Experience levels
- Your mindset
- The setting
- How you feel about your partner
- The techniques used
- Your body’s condition
Keep in mind that your O-face can be big, small, or anything in between. It comes (and goes) with a unique eb and flow that also depends on several biological factors. So, the best way to improve your performance in Oh-My-God Olympics is to attack the problem at its root.
How can I improve my orgasms?
Remember that your experience is supposed to be satisfying to you, not just your partner. They should be busy trying to make an O-face of their own. Their turn-ons aught to be what turns you on; that’s how this symbiotic sex dance works. If someone is being selfish, then even the most comprehensive tips will remain worthless.
“Orgasms are so much better when tempered in the flames of darkened desires and cooled in the waters of emotion.” – Hēdonē
To enhance the thickness and density of your heavenly hal-O, you’ve got to get serious about some things while letting other things go. For example, releasing inhibitions might allow you and/or your partner to try things that could boost sensations and target emotion. On the other hand, sitting down before bedtime to discuss boundaries is a great way to avoid embarrassing mishaps.
So, with all emotion invested, how does someone improve their orgasms without going off the deep end of debauchery? We all want something to talk about around the watercooler, yet we all want to experience mind-blowing sex as well. Where’s the common ground that prevents us from becoming unapproachable freaks? Hint: It’s already in your noggin.
Orgasm enhancement 101
Most of our intimate intelligence revolves around our ability to recall certain information about ourselves and/or our partners. That means it’s crucial to “know thyself” before even attempting to improve your love life. Nobody’s looking and the doctor says it’s good for you, so maybe masturbate a little bit until you’re more familiar with your body.
Meanwhile, enjoy a more robust orgasm while keeping the hair off of your palms by using some of these handy-dandy hacks:
#1. Branch Out and Try New Things
TARGET: Experience Levels
It’s not that you can’t ride the O-line without being a porn star. The problem is that inexperience often breeds anxiety, which ultimately reduces a person’s ability to get off. Plus, someone without a taste for extremes might freak out the first time they feel an orgasm. Many people have ended up in the emergency room that way.
By discovering and targeting skills, you can home in on what feels good while getting rid of what doesn’t. You can also use what you learn to share new things with incoming partners. Over time, your knowledge base will expand, and you’ll no longer be a noob or have noob-like sexual encounters.
#2. Get Rested and Relaxed
TARGET: Your Mindset
Like Chief Keef said, “Get your mind right.” That means never taking bad moods into the bedroom unless you plan to work them out in a productive way. It also means calming yourself down before you jump in the sheets and avoiding arguments once you get there. For some people, that’s easier said than done.
Prior to attempting a hail-Mary pass in the O-lympics, be sure you’re good and rested. Take a nap, have a hot bath, or smoke a joint. It doesn’t matter what you do, just enter the love shack with relaxed minds and muscles or else you’ll feel the wrath of anxiety in the form of friction. We’ll just leave it at that.
#3. Clean Up to Get Down
TARGET: The Setting
You don’t have to be a neat freak but reaching orgasm is certainly easier when both partners are presentable. So, clean yourself up and while you’re at it, tidy your environment as well. Did you know that your surroundings can affect your state of mind? Your mother would be so proud right now, given she never finds out why you’re finally cleaning the house.
Now, create a space that’s safe, sexy, inviting, and intimate. It should be lit appropriately for the intended scenario and accompanied by mood music. If you want to take it to the next level, stock it with high-quality supplies like personal lubricants, massage oils, scented candles, and aphrodisiac edibles. Here are some options you probably have in your house already:
- Chocolate
- Strawberries
- Champagne
- Apples
- Bananas (for obvious reasons)
- Oysters
- Pomegranates
- Salmon
- Honey
- Vanilla
Be creative about the setting because it affects more than just your state of mind. In fact, the devil is in the details on this one. If you don’t have enough space or the right kind of equipment, the night can turn sour in a hurry.
#4. Connect More Than Your Bodies
TARGET: How You Feel about Your Partner
Ejaculation requires little more than two genitals rubbing together rhythmically. In some cases, it doesn’t even require that. So, orgasm is obviously about something besides physical contact. That means you’ll have to breed closeness with your partner if you want this to work.
To pull off some productive intimacy, start finding ways to experience things together. If you’re in a long-distance relationship or too busy for frequent sex, employ technology to bridge the gap. You can use VR equipment that’s hooked up to automatic female or male sex toys and then enjoy simultaneous stimulation(we recommend using pocket pussies for men & clitoral vibrators for women) regardless of your schedules.
#5. Break into the Big Leagues
TARGET: The Techniques Used
You can’t buy tickets to a show that you don’t even know exists. So, this part of the puzzle takes some brave experimentation. What does that mean for you as a minor league player? Well, it means stepping up your sex toy and accessory game, for one. It might also mean getting a formal education through good old-fashioned, wholesome porn movie, for two.
Either way, it’s practice that makes perfect. You shouldn’t expect the most mind-blowing orgasm the world has ever known after a single attempt. If you do experience something as earth-shattering as that while still being a rookie, then consider yourself lucky and call me the “Get-It-On Guru” because you’re welcome.
#6. Take It Easy on Yourself
TARGET: Your Body’s Condition
Sex furniture is probably the greatest invention since sliced bread. That’s because it helps position one or more bodies in the throws of passion, all without buckling or breaking. These products come in a wide variety of shapes and sizes. Plus, some of them even have slots for your favorite sex toys.
Using sex pillows and wedges allows you to deploy, let’s say, more “creative” scenarios in the bedroom. Meanwhile, sex swings and slings add a flair of freak to the fiasco without sacrificing safety. You can lay these supports on the floor, drape them across the mattress, or hang them from the door frame for some 360-degree fun.
The point of this exercise is to ensure safety and satisfaction at the same time. For instance, you and your partner should feel secure enough to expand your sexual horizons with one another to prevent anxiety. And if you’re doing this alone, the same rules apply.
Orgasm safety tips
To achieve a safe yet satisfying orgasm, you’ve got to be smart about sex. Didn’t anyone ever tell you that climaxes require concentration? The fact of the matter is that most people who squirt say they can only gush when their minds are hushed. So, while you might not be able to quiet your racing thoughts in the middle of sex, consider these tips at the very least:
- Take it slow when you’re trying things for the first few times.
- Never begin with large, insertable sex toys unless you’re familiar with your tolerance.
- Use more than enough lube, especially if you’re doing anal.
- Keep all of your sex toys clean and put away.
- Respect weight limits and orifice diameters.
As always, follow the instructions on any equipment you use and never assume anything about yourself or your partner.
The money shot
Orgasms and ejaculation may not be the same thing, but the best sexual experiences always “come” when you carefully obsess about the quality of your O-face.